Tuesday, July 07, 2009
I can't help but watch

I accidentally followed a blatant Twitter marketer.

You know the type. Not the nice PR geek, network builder or gentle social influencer. The hardcore, pyramid scheme-style, in-your-face, get-1,000-no-10,000-new-followers-RIGHT-NOW-or-you're-an-IDIOT type. Also one that hides their true raison-d'etre in a normal-looking Twitter stream.

So I got sent a link (which I will link to in this post now, just once) with a guy telling me, direct to camera, how I could learn the secrets of finding ten to fifty new leads a day for my business.

Man, he is frickin' awesome. I think it's something inside me that draws me into late-night shopping channels. As the ad for the Zick Zick Chopper draws to a close I always vow to go to bed. Then, out of nowhere, I'm half-way through Easy-Yo dried yoghurt mix or the Bissell Proheat. Hours later, I'm still frozen in awe.

I think it's the ability for a human being to be so incredibly convincing about a subject that's so blatantly a load of old b*****ks. Their complete and utter devotion to being honest, endearing and motivating is so fake that it becomes hyper-real. The entire performance is like nothing you'd ever see on stage or screen. I spend at least two-thirds of my time watching these things imagining the people in their normal lives, saying normal things to their friends or family.

If you could bottle what this guy has and sell it, you'd make a fortune. Probably on QVC.