Monday, October 18, 2010
Email to 1998 from Simon




SUBJECT: word of advice for young me


Hello mate,

at some point this year, you're going to go to university. Your flatmate's will be cunts. sorry to break it to you but it's really not worth trying to get on with them.

Also, you're going to pass a pretty red head every so often who will smile at you. Now i need you to grow a pair of balls and speak to her! i never did find out why she would smile at me, but i like to think it was an invitation to chat her up. Do it and get back to me how it goes.

chips and cheese is not a meal. That's why you have so many spots. Also triple vodkas and red bull are not your friend.

Don't waste your money on those scuba diving lessons you were contemplating. Scuba in the uk is cold and shit. Once i saw a fish. but it wasn't worth being given mouth to mouth resuscitation by a hairy greek guy.

Oh and don't get too depressed in the big city. Eventually you will marry a cute brazillian girl who has no dress sense but is filthy in bed.

hang in there big guy.